Überdeen

i havent done a post for ages, this is partly cos i have been to four separate countries in the last 10 days, if you include england and hampstead. i took my camera all the way to überdeen on the aeroplane and failed to take any pictures at all.

so heres some really old ones, back in the day when you had to use some kind of analogue technique to get pictures.

this is aberdeen! hurrah! for aberdeen.



near there is also a beach, if you go the long way back from lidl you can walk around on it, except! when i was doing that a bloke in chemical protection suit ran up to me and told me to go home as quickly as possible, trying not to breathe too deeply. you always get weirdos like that in uberdeen so i ignored him.



one weekend me and my greek m8s hired a car and did a load of driving all round scotland. this is way up in the north west, north of ullapool. it is really fantastic up there, much better than cacky old new zealand anyway, and there are pies here.



if anyone wants to see more of this old bull, comment me up.

ooo and when i got my camera back home again i realised it had been on two internal flights and one intercontinental one (three x ray machines and a hand search) and nobody had noticed the packet of razor blades tucked in the memory card pocket. note to terrorists: if you can disguise a bomb as a packet of razor blades, this is a potential loophole.

minging toe part 1

about 2 months ago (while i was in jaffna actually) some bird trod on my toe with her high heel, very heavily. i blasphemed freely and loudly. it has since gone all sorts of colours and is taking ages to get better, in fact the other week i squeezed it and got loads of stinking brown pus out of it. it is so entertaining as a biological process that i took a picture, and if it gets any more minging there will be others



see the colours! see the new toenail growing up behind! hellish

update! to last post

someone has pointed out that one of the photos in the last post has been badly photoshopped to make it look as if me and the boy were canoeing on some lame ass river in Devon. we regret the error and here publish the actual original photo:

canoeay

i forgot! something much more exciting than what happened last week, is what happened this week! we looked at the weather forecast (arctic conditions) and decided to go canoeing



here is a canoe, and a car. for the beginners out there, the canoe is the one we are lifting.

then we launched all by ourselves, and forward! on the MITEY DART (note sensible clothing, mother):



you can take that yellow canoe, rob says. it is UNCAPSIZABLE, rob says, so you can take it.

eventual fate of UNCAPSIZABLE canoe on the MITEY DART:





the sort of thing that just accidentally happens from time to time:

happy new year!

ye i know i know it was ages ago, i know, YES alright FINE OK shut it. note the high class head torches, carrier bag and choice of party establishment.

meh i was going to make this longer but bored now. january 24th is the most depressing day of the year, and to celebrate i have found a new method of putting pillows into pillowcases

for your information: photos

the rubbish crappy photos with the stupid rubbish red number thing in the bottom right are taken by john, and used without specific permission. Thanks, John!

carrom

there is a game in sri lanka called carrom, and i'm fantastic at it. it's basically just pool with fingers rather than cues, and it is an excellent sport for people like me because you can stay sat on your arse rather than doing all that stressful walking around the table. it looks like this:



to make it all slippery you cover it with talc, then shoot by flicking the flicker with your finger:



the object of the game is to bugger about for half an hour or so missing the pockets, then you take a vote on whether to give up and watch telly instead. in the following picture, john has just won a vote to continue playing:



john bought a board in sri lanka and tried to take it back to britain cos he didn't think he could survive without it. it got took off him at the airport boo hiss. little did he know you can get them in leicester! ha ha ha ha!